Author Archives: Athena’s Law

There is no justice in my truths.

Not if I feel guilt with them.

Divine retribution for my sins of lying.

I will admit to every betrayal I made but I will never be cleansed of the pain I inflicted on others on my quest for the pleasures of a man.

I am no saint nor will I ever claim to be.

I am feverish, a plague to all that cross my path to nowhere.

There is no justice in my truths if I have sinned in order to claim to be a noble one.

I am a façade.

Molding into everything I despised as a child.

Oh how disappointed my young eyes are as they stare back into my raging soul.

When will this fire in my veins be gone.

I have ripped every artery from my burning body but my punishment allows me to feel the guilt from my forgiving God.

All these trials I fought to overcome.

All these nights I gambled everything away.

All these mistakes I never learned from, eat away at my humanity.

I will never know peace.

Nor do I deserve to.

I am a crime upon the dust that made me.

And if the earth raged it’s voice at me I would understand.

For I was not honest and I was not human.

I threw away my humanity and when I tried to regain it I received every ounce of pain I inflicted.

Do not ask who I am.

I do not know.

I was once a good person.

Now I am incomplete.

Fragments of me are shattered throughout my body.

To remind me of who I am when I am free to be myself.

August 4, 2022

-Athena’s Law

The Embers of my love have grown weary.

My lover who can never love me again.

My lover who I could never dream to touch.

The flames have softened with time.

My tears still streaming.

Only to force my realizations.

I have lost you.

My lovely Ember who only loved me.

My heart swells with absence.

Your absence.

I have no content.

I only blame myself.

A fence is only so strong.

A weekend is only so long.

A night is only so scary.

A second is where I lost you.

When I took your right to live freely.

It took all my inner peace to make the choice.

-Athena’s Law

I think of who I am without you and I’m lost in who I never knew I was.

I think of our love and nothings changed.

I can only love you in the darkness.

The daylight doesn’t know our love.

And those strangers who’d tell me of my own affections towards you,

Have become a burden.

Because the world could see how deeply I wanted to treasure you.

And I’ll curse the seconds to every rising sun.

Once that first light peaks through the window I know that you won’t love me anymore.

To those who praised me for loving you.

Look at me now.

They’d think I’m a fool for it now.

I’ll leave that love in the darkness.

I never want the sun to set again.

I’ll curse the sun set for leaving me with mixed emotions.

I myself curse my name for loving you too much.

My eyes bleed from all the tears.

My feet have grow weak from walking alone.

The moments I had wish to be special,

Now feel like a child’s dream.

I’ll never curse the love,

But I curse the amount of love I was so willing to give.

Because it was thrown back at me.

Now what am I but a fool,

To those strangers who’d be amazed by how obvious my love for you was?

To those special moments I wanted to keep making.

To those who wanted to give me the world.

To them I am the biggest fool.

I cannot cry when so many had told me along that journey of loving you.

I had too much faith, too much trust, too much love.

And the bet I had placed.

The thing I had lost, was my soul.

The innocence of loving someone without fear.

The day light and the moon light bring me no comfort.

I dread them both.

No matter how many times I hold you.

Or how many times I fool myself into thinking this love is possible.

I still see the sun rising.

Reality has set in.

All the love that was left in me had slowly wilted.

Every weekend you broke my heart willingly.

And that’s the love I’ll curse.

That I loved you without limits.

That I loved you without boundaries.

That I loved you regardless of everything.

To those who don’t know love yet,

I destroyed my own heart willingly.

I take responsibility for my sufferings.

The world knew it was dangerous to love you.

So I take responsibility for my stupidity.

For the signs I chose to ignore in order to continue to love you.

The sun has now risen.

All the love I had hoped to give you,

Has been stolen.

The amount of love I asked for wasn’t a lot.

Yet when I did ask, I was asking for too much.

I had only dreamed of holding your hand,

And going on picnics with you.

I had only wished that you would pick a flower off the side of the road for me just because you wanted to show me your affections.

But the sun has risen and all those little moments I treasured.

And all those moments I dreamed of having with you.

Have gone away with the fog of night.

I see clearly.

No matter how still the world is.

No matter how loud the world is.

I can hear my heart crumbling every sun rise.

May 22, 2021

-Athena’s Law